I heard something recently that said, “the best self care practice is the one you actually do”.
This made me laugh out loud because it is so true. It made me wonder why it is so hard for us to gift ourselves time and presence for the generous and loving act of self care.
Living in a world where we are conditioned to believe that success in all areas of your life (including well-being) is measured by how busy you are and how much you are doing, it is easy to be programmed into thinking the best way to achieve wellness is by creating yet another list and schedule. And yet, in doing so, we are creating an energy around self care that is pressurised, directional and heavy.
I have had countless women come to me and tell me that they have “failed” because they didn’t keep up their self care routine. When I ask them what that means, they say, “I planned it all out, yoga three times a week, Monday, Wednesday and Friday. I meditate on Saturday mornings and even set alarms to remind me to drink enough, I don’t understand why I find it so hard to just stick to it!”
Does this sound familiar? Instead of having self -care on the never ending to-do list you can focus instead on creating a nourishing self care practice (because we are always evolving and growing) that is fluid and in tune with what you actually need. In doing so, you immediately shift the energy back into the natural self-care feminine energy of BEING.
The loving act of self care is a feminine, soft, loving, nurturing energy. Putting it on a to-do list forces it out of it’s natural state into a masculine, go, go, do, do energy. It becomes something to achieve rather than something to nurture, something to explore, something to create, something to nourish yourself and heal yourself.
Allowing yourself to embrace this feminine energy does not mean you are unproductive or under achieving; what it means is that you are creating balance and harmony within your body and mind that is natural to the rhythms and cycles of your life. It means letting go of the idea of success and failure and instead tuning into flow, intuition and trust.
To get out of the do, do, do mentality, I actually use the words “spiritual practices” or “sacred self care” to describe the time I create for acts of self love.
When you recognise your mind and body as the sacred vessel, the sacred temple in which your soul resides, you will naturally flow into a state of heart felt, loving care. You will nourish and nurture yourself as the divine being you are, remembering that the divine lives within you.
We get so caught up in the ‘how to’s’ and the ‘what’s next’ that our focus is always outside of ourselves in a future that none of us can predict so take a moment to settle down, settle into the present moment, be present with yourself and your energy. Just BECOME it. Become the energy.
Quiet your mind, slow your breath and tune in to your body. Your body always knows exactly what you need. Simply open your heart and allow your intuition, your small quiet voice to speak to you with love and care.
“What do I need right now?”
“What I would love to feel?”
“Who I am?”
“What future do I want to create and how do I tune in to that energy of creation in this present moment?”
You may decide what you are calling in is a walk in nature, or to move your body in ways that make it feel alive, you may wish to spend time in prayer or ritual, in journaling, in watching the stars or planting in your garden.
The beauty and simplicity of living a heart centered life means that everything you do is a sacred act of self love.
Life always loves you, life always chooses to express itself with you and through you, this is universal law. By going deeper into flow and by allowing yourself to receive through sacred acts of self love you begin creating a life that fills your heart and makes you feel whole.